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May 2, 2010
Were you betrayed, cheated, insulted?
Is that smoke I see coming out of your ears? Are you disappointed about something that happened to you? Are you thinking of getting even?
But let’s be realistic: There are only two ways to react and taking revenge is not one of them, because it always ends up lashing back at you. And what makes your situation even more challenging is the fact that both of these steps are not easy, because they require thinking outside the box.
We can’t shake hands with a clenched fist.
- Indira Gandhi
What are the two steps? Letting go is one and — if you can — forgiving is the other. This is common knowledge, preached extensively by all religions. But both steps are very difficult, as I know from my own experience.
I am sure many leaders will disagree with me when I say. “It’s okay to be angry and to think of settling the score.” But there is one very important qualification: It’s okay just for now! Eventually, over time, we have no other choice than to let go and (if we can) to forgive. Only then can we move on to heal the damage and reinstate our self-confidence.
How long will your period of revenge last? That is up to your personality – but the shorter the better! And keep in mind that however hurtful and disappointing the event may have been, there is one good thing about it: It bears a valuable lesson that will prevent you from repeating the situation next time.
Are you in a getting-even process right now? Make it as short as possible.
